Out of the mouth of babes
| December 27, 2010 | Posted by under Family, Health, Kids |
The other day Joshua and I were playing with his toy tool set. He was walking around with his screwdriver and drill, and I was telling him what to “fix”. After “fixing” every major item in our living room, Josh looked at me and ask “What else can I fix Abba.” I promptly stuck out my foot and said, “Here you go honey, fix my foot.” He looked up at me, scrunched his face and reminded, “You can’t fix people Abba”
A couple of weeks ago I wrote a quick post on healing . Without going into too much detail, my wife and I have been dealing with some drama on her side of the family. This drama has created a great deal of stress in our lives. Sadly, part of this stress is self inflicted in that that we keep believing that unhealthy people will start acting, healthy – that there is something we can say or do to help them understand, change and grow. But the reality is we can’t. You can’t fix people. One of my New Year’s resolutions will be to remember that conversation/Axiom
I wasted a lot of years trying to “fix” people before I learned this lesson. You’re right: we can’t “fix” anyone. If there’s any fixing to be done, it has to come from them and there are no magic words or actions one can do to make it happen.
Sometimes we can accept them as they are and live with it, but sometimes we just have to let go and remove them from our lives. Sad but true.
Fortunately, we have friends and loved ones who are here to support us and help us through the damage inflicted from those that are broken.
Keep on keepin’ on, brutha. You’re one of the good ones.
–Liz
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Heather Welliver and dsobkowiak, Corey J. Feldman. Corey J. Feldman said: Out of the mouth of babes http://bit.ly/hgRDzE [...]
Thanks Liz!
Corey it usually takes 2 to Tango and i’m not sayin’ your wife’s family isn’t part of it but family situations are always complicated and never 100% black and white this side right that side wrong or anything. not sayin’ 50-50 in your case who knows but your post implies you guys need no kinda fixin’ at all???
doesn’t count to say “part of this stress is self inflicted in that that we keep believing that unhealthy people will start acting, healthy – that there is something we can say or do to help them understand, change and grow. But the reality is we can’t. You can’t fix people.” that’s like sayin’ “sorry if you were offended by what i said back there.” that’s no apology and no responsibility taken on yourself. it’s an artifice.
no cracks in that mirror? none? i’m just askin’ man.
[...] month I wrote a post called Out of the mouth of babes. In this post, I explained how something my 4 year old (well almost 4 at the time) said reminded me [...]
@Chris http://www.coreyjf.com/2011/01/does-it-take-two-to-tango/